The Lady From Dry Creek Speaking to Family Heartache
My guest today is my good friend Author Janet Tronstad of the Dry Creek series. If you haven’t read any of her books, you should! Fun and fast-paced and genuine. I love ficitonal Dry Creek, Montana! Today Janet tells us some about her characters and about her life. She also asks some poignant questions at the end that I hope you’ll comment about. Here’s Janet:
“Strong Mothers, Strong Sons
In my recent series, Return to Dry Creek, I tell the story of Gracie Stone and her three sons. The series begins when Gracie returns to Dry Creek after serving a jail term for the murder of her abusive husband. Readers quickly learn in the series that Gracie did not kill her husband, but she believed one of her sons had done so. She went to prison because she felt guilty for not taking her sons away from their father. She assumed that decision permitted the kind of violence that drove a young boy to murder.
This series has been so interesting for me to write because I know the difficulties that families can face. Verbal abuse, physical abuse – they are hard for children to understand. And I had to think of how to show the grown sons processing their feelings about their father’s abuse as they, one by one, come home to work on the family ranch.
One way I showed their struggle throughout the four books was to have an ongoing task. They needed to think of some words to put on a marker for their father’s grave. One son wanted to only put the man’s name, the other wanted to disown the man through words, a third just wanted to say he wished things had been different.
I realized as the sons faced their dilemma that most of us need to find, at various times, words to describe a relationship that has been painful to us. Whether it’s a parent’s epitaph or something as simple as finding a birthday card for a sibling who is estranged from us. It is all difficult.
I wouldn’t talk about this topic on all blogs, but I know Lyn specializes in strong women and coping with adversity is the first way we become strong
So I’ll be the first to raise my hand here and acknowledge that I have a brother who is not talking to me. Every year I look for a birthday card that has words to suit our relationship.
I’ll wager that most people have a sibling, an old friend, an ex, or some person for whom they chose their words carefully (so as not to offend or seem naïve). If you do, I’d love it if you’d share.
Also does anyone have some good tips on what to say when (like in these books) the abusive one is dead and the family still feels the need for an epitaph?
Does one just go with the truth or abstain from saying much? Any thoughts as to what the sons should say?”–Janet
A difficult problem, Janet. I faced a similar one when my mother began sinking into dementia and paranoia. What does one say to someone you love when they become irrational?
I hope you’ll take this opportunity to share how you have handled something like this. Perhaps you can help someone else. –Lyn
To find out more about Janet, drop by www.JanetTronstad.com
