Author Kristen Heitzmann & Her Father’s Rage
I’m delighted to welcome author Kristen Heitzmann as my guest today. Her story is a bit different and intriguing. Here’s Kristen:
Rage and Violence
Lyn, thanks for the chance to blog here on your Strong Women, Brave Stories Site. I’m sure it blesses so many. My story is not unusual, but I hope it can encourage others in similar circumstances.
I grew up in a family where my dad reigned—with rage and violence. While he did things like teach me to read at a preschool age and hose down the front lawn so we kids could ice skate, from the earliest age I can remember, I knew he wasn’t safe. He also wasn’t nice. In spite of this, he was good—or wanted to be. He loved God with all his heart and served him ceaselessly. Both aspects, while contradictory, were intrinsic.
As you can imagine, this was disorienting. My mother and sister coped as well as they could , but hey, someone’s got to stir the pot. Yeah, that’s me. Daughter number two, middle child, occurring shortly before the favored son. Let’s say I made life interesting. Optimistic and intrepid, I drew on the resources inside me to deal with whatever came my way.
One of my greatest strengths,
One of my greatest strengths, I believe, is that I never confused God with my dad, as so many women do, judging and rejecting God because of parental wounds. While I didn’t feel loved by my dad, I always had a sense of God’s love and presence. In all my rebellions, I never turned away from the Lord, never doubted his existence or his rightful and beloved Lordship. I believe this, along with the ability to hope and continuously seek and anticipate the good in people and situations, came through unadulterated grace.
I loved my mother, whom I lost last April. She set an example of unconditional love for her husband that was nothing short of saintly, especially since his issues were caused by a long and debilitating neurological disorder. The difficulty I have is that it required such a departure from reality and a desertion of everyone else to accomplish it. It seems that was her way to be strong.
My way is to pierce the veils,
My way is to pierce the veils, to see things as they are—even broken and ugly—and to forgive, but not blindly accept what damages others. Real strength lies in the light of even harshest truth, not the dimness of illusion.
To purchase this book, click here.
The Breath of Dawn (A Rush of Wings)
My Heroine Quinn Reilly
That’s the concept I incorporated in my character Quinn Reilly, the female lead in my latest novel The Breath of Dawn. Quinn has been raised in a cult-like church with her father as the pastor whose protective but limiting views of women distort God’s call for all his people. When a conman preys on their church, Quinn takes a stand no one else will—and it costs her. When she meets the grieving widower, Morgan Spencer, and his family, she experiences the real love of God and sees in Morgan’s love for his little girl a reflection of the Father’s love. But can she break through his walls, and does she dare?–Kristen
http://www.kristenheitzmannbooks.com/
Thanks, Kristen. Your mother must have loved your father very much. How lovely it will be to meet your father in heaven where he will no longer harbor his anger.
QUESTION: Have you had to deal with a difficult family member? How did you handle it?–Lyn
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